“Tell me one more time about your day – especially the part about the coat that was just what you wanted except the collar was weird and it had a belt instead of buttons but it was also kind of cute so maybe you’ll go back to Macy’s and look at it a second time.” -- Brilliant! You nailed so many of my shopping dilemmas!
I wish more people had known that Booming existed. I might still be writing for the New York Times instead of just the Funny Times.
Full of Yule tide cheer. Joyce, you got a lot of stuff too, and I love it.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, Joyce, but surely you know you're not the only one (then or now.)
I know about the others. But with them, it's just sex.
“Tell me one more time about your day – especially the part about the coat that was just what you wanted except the collar was weird and it had a belt instead of buttons but it was also kind of cute so maybe you’ll go back to Macy’s and look at it a second time.” -- Brilliant! You nailed so many of my shopping dilemmas!
This year it's raw milk with cookies. Make note.
Neil Diamond? There's no going back.
Hal, try it sometime on the Thruway. Rmmm, rmmmm, rmmmm!
You'd better not cry, you'd better not pout.
But shouting is good!
Try to smile, you little creep.
Santa turns you into sheep,
Even if your life is crappy
Best to look like you are happy
In his unforgiving eye.
.
Santa never asks you why
You might feel the urge to cry
No lollipop or candy cane
Can ease your existential pain.
Is it because you’ll die?
.
Born beneath an ozone hole
The world is one big lump of coal
All its promises are phoney
You dig and dig, but there’s no pony.
Or reindeer in the sky.
Life is nasty, short and hard
But don’t go quoting Kierkegaard
On the sadness of it all
To the fellow at the mall
He’ll swat you like a fly.
https://jerryadlersnewsverse.com/2014/11/28/have-yourself-a-newsverse-christmas/